You're afraid, aren't you?
Don't be shy. Consider this your safe space.
You're afraid of the thought of abandonment. You're insecure about the scars on your body. You're embarrassed by how your body responds when you think about something you shouldn't.
When people are running after you out of pure desire, you find yourself running away from yourself. It's one thing to put on a mask during a candlelit dinner, but when you strip down, exposing your skin behind closed doors, wouldn't it be a tragedy if you're not your true self?
Take a deep breath and be vulnerable.
Here is how to embrace your sexual self.
It's Normal
The topic of sex is considered taboo, to be treated with either illicit giggles, frowns, or anger. It's ironic how something deeply rooted in our flesh is never talked about openly. As a result, we suppress our wants and needs in a place where we must be our true selves: the bedroom.
We must learn to be comfortable in our skin and know that it is okay for you to be, well, you.
Communication
You can't possibly be happy with someone who you can't be yourself with.
Subsequently, you can't expect your partner to magically know your needs and wants sexually without you communicating it to them. Indulge in conversation with them. Let them know your deepest, darkest fantasies so they can love you better.
You'll be surprised at how much you can enhance your sex life just by being vocal about what you want.
Positive Self-Talk
You can't embrace your sexual self if you're continuously dismissing your own needs. Remember, each time you trample over your own wants and not be selfish, you do an injustice to yourself and the relationship. Hence, you must cultivate confidence by talking positively about your needs and becoming more assertive and demanding.
Consent and Boundaries
Furthermore, another grave setback of not embracing your sexual self is being okay with things you do not like in the bedroom. A crucial step is to establish consent and boundaries. Be very upfront with what you will not allow; the same approach goes for your partner and their boundaries.
It's all about cultivating mutual respect and trust.
Reach Out and Explore
Sometimes, you need someone, a friend, other than your partner to let you know that it is okay to feel what you are feeling. Try reaching out to a friend or sibling with whom you are genuinely comfortable. Sharing anxieties and insecurities with them will help you open up and learn many things about yourself.
Lastly, don't be afraid of exploration.
Take Vantessa, for example, in author Bristol Wedgewood's sensational erotic series Confessions of a Cyber Girl. Being a simple and shy girl, Vantessa is led by her curiosity into a realm of delectably indulgent experiences. Read through her riveting story leading up to Volume 4, where she teeters between her life as a school teacher and sexual goddess.
Click on the link to learn more.